I am a terrible dater.
False, I am a very good dater, I can hold a conversation with nearly anyone, male or female, I can flirt my way to high heaven with gentle persuasion, I know exactly how to move subjects to my own liking and can use my body to influence peoples reactions.
That’s the easy bit. What I can not do it keep my knickers on, that and maintain being nice after.
It’s just all a bit easy, I find men, too easy.
I don’t respect them afterwards, sounds daft yes, but completely true.
Take Plenty of Fish for example, joined on Friday, too many messages and way too many ‘Would like to meet’ it just feels too easy, almost like I could be anyone and they would say yes, do men say yes to every woman? Is there no longer the thrill of a bit of chase……?
Now the women reading this will hate me for saying this……But…..
I have two sons, both coming up to the age where they are expressing an interest in the opposite sex, and I couldn’t help saying….”Don’t ever play it too nice, be nice but not too nice”
Hmm, ok so maybe this is why the world of dating is what it is because of mothers like me, however it’s the truth.
I want an equal footing, I don’t want to be pandered to, harassed, over messaged and over loved.
On the same note, I don’t want to be unloved, no messages and to do all the chasing as that is just so boring, finding the equilibrium is what is driving me to being an arsehole, a pain in the arse, arsehole. Now I would like to say it’s just because I’m picky but that’s totally not the case.
It’s taken years of systematic wrong turns and tilted avenues to bring me here, I allowed men to change how I perceive myself, and in turn how I perceive them. Maybe we should all blame the mothers, sons and daughters alike for the wrong doings towards others as well as taking the blame ourselves, for are we just a mirror of warped situations and glimpses of shadows of people we have allowed to touch our souls, whether we wanted them to or not.
I don’t have to date, I don’t need to have a man around but I do like male company, sometimes, this weekend I have the choice of multiple men to go to dinner with, have drinks with, even to just have sex with and I can’t be bothered. I’m just not that bothered.
The thrill of meeting a fella that you like is good, but shopping for them on the internet is really quite disturbing.
Perhaps I should ask my Mother to arrange a marriage for me……As she has to take some of the blame….